Crackberries Go Wacked, Downloaders Get Smacked, and Intel's Been Jacked

Quite a bit went on yesterday, from outages to oustings to the outrageous, and we're here to make sure you're kept in the loop. And away we go!

First up was a brief revival of last year's hit musical "Oh God, my smartphone is dead" as RIM's Blackberry network bit the big one for a second time in less than a year, leaving millions of addicts — including a certain Leader of the Free World who shall remain nameless — without their beloved Crackberries. RIM — anybody else think they should rename it RIP? — is blaming it on a routine upgrade gone wrong, but we're thinking it's time to switch to Android, 'cause everyone knows crack is wack.

Speaking of all things wack, the UK is planning an ISP-level game of Wack-A-Mole with file-sharers under a new proposal that would require ISPs to disconnect users who access pirated materials under a three-strikes-you're-out system. The ISPs say the plan just isn't cricket, as cutting off pirates could cost them billions of pounds in lost revenues. Meanwhile, New York is moving to cut off registered sex offenders from sites like MySpace and Facebook, which frequently act as an online smorgasbord for predators. The plan — which would require registered offenders to hand over their screen-names to the government so they can be blocked by social networks — seems a bit naïve given the technical loopholes available online, but if passed would be the first of its kind.

While we're on the subject of government regulation, Intel's German offices felt the sting of regulation yesterday as EU investigators raided several locations and and collected evidence for the Commission's ongoing anti-trust probe. Intel says it's "cooperating," but we suspect that means "hiding the evidence while they climb the stairs." Comcast, meanwhile, has , admitting openly to the practice in their response to the FCC's probe, despite several months spent denying the practice to everyone from customers to Congress. Here's hoping they get what they deserve.

Last but not least, it's your daily dose of Yahoo news, with the shocking announcement that the stock-picker in charge of the investment fund that owns the second-largest share of Yahoo wants Microsoft to offer more money. Gasp — how could we not have seen that coming, a stockbroker wanting to sell high? Meanwhile, Yahoo finally scored one on their arch-competitor, convincing T-Mobile to drop Google for Yahoo as fast asStarbucks dropped T-Mobile for AT&T. The day wasn't a total bust for the number-one searcher, though, as Nokia announced they still have love for Big Daddy G.

That's about all the wack we can take, so we're out.

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