Dirty Harry - A New Beginning

I noticed the other day that there's a new Rambo movie out. I haven't seen it yet but I saw some of the stills and for 62, Stallone is still looking pretty good. This got me thinking about what other old Hollywood characters might be ripe for a sequel. One of my favorites would have to be "Dirty" Harry Callahan, played by Clint Eastwood.

But I'm thinking that Mr. Eastwood, at 77, is probably too old to play Dirty Harry again. Although, maybe not, he might pull it off. Maybe next there'd be a new spaghetti western, say High Plains Colonoscopy... OK, maybe not.

So then the question is: Who's gonna play the new Harry Calahan? I know its hard to imagine somebody else in the role, but it turns out that Eastwood was not the first choice for the role. According to Wikipedia the role was offered to Eastwood only after Frank Sinatra, Steve McQueen, and Paul Newman declined the role. Also considered for the role were John Wayne and Marlon Brando.

Well, for me there's only one choice: Bill Gates. I know what you're saying: Dude, give me a hit off that before you throw it down.

Suspend your disbelief for a moment and I'll tell you why: Here in the real world of computers I often have to use Windoze or help somebody use Windoze. Its the normal routine: install some software, reboot. Install some hardware, reboot. Install some device drivers, reboot. Sometimes the system won't shutdown. Sometimes it won't reboot and you have to boot into "Safe Mode" for no apparent reason at all before you actually reboot. Sometimes it won't reboot for more serious reasons and then you're really screwed, etc, etc.

So, every time I reboot a Windoze computer I close my eyes and I see the scene in my head (if you need to see it again, go here, about 3:00 minutes into the clip). Only I see Bill Gates, doing his best Clint Eastwood impression (and he's pretty good at it), saying:

I know what you're thinking, did I install six device drivers or only five.
Well to tell you the truth in all this excitement I've kinda lost track myself.
But bein' this is Windows XP, the most powerful operating system in the world and would blow your hard disk clean off.
You've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?'

Well, do ya, punk?

Regrettably, I never do, feel lucky that is.


Mitch Frazier is an Associate Editor for Linux Journal.


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Shawn Powers's picture

I'll never be able to watch Dirty Harry again. Darn you Mitch Frazier.


Shawn Powers is an Associate Editor for Linux Journal. You might find him chatting on the IRC channel, or Twitter

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